V1-V3, 350, 500 bike? Anyone selling?

And 0 HP at 13,501 RPM as it seizes so tight you need a 2x4 and a 12lb sledge to drive the piston out of the cylinder and split the case halves since the disintegrated bearings have welded everything into one solid mass. I love 2 strokes. You should reconsider Mid-Ohio. The security Nazis were sent packing some time ago and a good time will be had by all. It is a 13 hr trip for me so I don't want to hear any whining from you. Get your union Hampsters to drive you. I think Dr. McDead may make the journey.

Ken

 

Ken-

How come I never had any such catastrophic seizures on any 2-stroke, to include my first one, a BSA Bantam, which, as a youth, I flogged without any mercy. No matter what I did, it kept running...I think you and your Lost Boy 4-popper brethren have watched too many reruns of old nuclear testing movies. There are absolutely no fissionable materials inside a 2-stroke, Ken!!!

Now get over it and Join in for the Big Win! Throw away those dark goggles issued to you at Alamogordo, get rid of those Giant Atomic Spider eats Los Angeles comic books, and stop having seizures before you get a stroke, maybe even two strokes,who knows?

It's time for you to catch up to 2-Stroke Progress! Cast off those shackles of cams and valves and front chain oilers! Step boldly into your racing future!

 

Charles, please, get a hold of yourself, I can spend the rest of the day regaling you with near death two-stroke experiences to no avail...You were witness yourself to Comet Hale-Bopp's appearance on the front straight of Roebling, but you persist in this senseless twaddle, perpetuating this fantasy land of yours, where all is right in the world if only everyone was aboard a gaggle of race prepped Combat Wombats...So just pack up your jeweler's lens, your Ratio-Wrong, your ash can full of main jets and needles of all profiles, and that semi-truck full of spark plugs, and go sell it somewhere else...Preferably somewhere where they can safely dispose of that tub of muriatic acid...

Don't get into a tizzy and start waving that dingleberry hone at me again, I'll just call security and none of those rodents of yours are tagged...So off ya go, that's a good lad...Ringy ding ding, putt putt, sizzle pop, boom-squeek, whatever it is you people do...

 

Chum my friend...and proud Inuk!:

First of all, the 'incident' (as we prefer to call it) on the front straight at Roebling was Scott 'Fireball' McCain showing us what to do in case of an emergency; the bike was rigged to explode and turn molten, so Scott could demonstrate a proper dismount. This is quite useful if one is tasked with riding 2-stroke singles in combat zones, y'know, IEDs, mortars, RPG's, heavy machine guns, and artillery.

Never threaten my hampsters.

 

I give this diatribe a D- on content but a A+ on presentation - very entertaining. :up:

 

Jim, I tell you the 4-stroke guys seem to be fueled by a blind rage! Dr. McDead, famed analyst and world adventurer, has told me that he believes he knows the source of their angst: an envy of 2-strokes, leading to bouts of depression.

 

Pifffle...You smell like bean oil, Chaz...

 

Charles,
You are quite close with the term "Inuk" the term in the Native Alaskan Yup'ik language is "Iluq" which is your close friend that you depend on to do guy stuff with. The closest analogy would be like a racing buddy. I hadn't realized you were such a linguist.

"Never threaten my hampsters"? I thought they were our Hampsters. Have I not invested my life savings, blood and sweat into this endeavor, too? Speaking of which, At what point will I begin to make back the money I have invested with you? You initially told me I would be getting a 12 - 15% APR on my investment. I understood and even contributed more for you to get rid of that pesky rodent fungus that infected the herd, but you also said that since my money was delayed that you had reinvested it and should expect a 25- 35% return. I was concerned when you explained that the funds were being processed by our Nigerian partners and would be dispersed by cashiers check via the company bank in Canada, even with the assurances of Dr. Magumbe that the "government" had signed the permits. I have been patient, but I would like to know when I will be getting my check and pictures of the orphanage where the rest of the money is going.

Ken