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Financial success vs happiness?

Discussion in 'General' started by Rob P, Apr 2, 2015.

  1. Rob P

    Rob P Well-Known Member

    So I figured you guys might be a good group to offer feedback. Here is my dilemma:

    I am currently in a high paying very secure career. It was never a dream or anything, more like a stroke of luck and some good choices when I was young which landed me in this position. The problem is I am very unhappy in my job and my overall outlook on the career isn't much better. Unfortunately, I have another 20+ years before I can even contemplate retirement so that isn't even a realistic consideration at this point.

    About ten years ago, I was really feeling the burnout and went back to school for engineering and finished just before the economy took a shit. I never wound up working in the field because of financial and stability concerns and I feel at this point it would be near impossible to land a job due to the length of time which has past since graduation and lack of any real experience. Then there is the financial side of it which puts entry level salary about a third of what I currently make and my lifestyle is suited to. Fortunately, through the decrease in work and the distraction of school I have been able to squeeze another ten years out of my current career. Unfortunately, I have since been married, had a child and become more financially entrenched in my current career.

    I am looking for some way to increase the happiness factor in my work life. All of the things I would love to do I doubt I could support myself. I can't see completely uprooting my family's lifestyle simply for my needs but I also see how my work life effects my family.

    I am sure there are more people out there in similar circumstances who have made positive changes without turning their lives upside down. I am really searching for answers and advice to find better work/life balance.
     
  2. zippytech

    zippytech Running On Pumpedupness!!

    Happiness period
     
  3. Sabre699

    Sabre699 Wait...hold my beer.


    What was the question?
     
  4. rhouck

    rhouck wat?

    I left a job where I had to work too much, and took a job that I work significantly less, but also get paid less. I don't regret it at all.

    That said, I don't have children or a spouse (she works) who were relying on my paycheck. The obvious answer seems to be "quit your job and get a new one", but your post makes it sound like that is impossible.

    So is your question "how can I be happy at a job that I hate?" Not sure anyone can answer that without knowing significant details about your job specifically.

    First thing would be: what is it about your current job that makes you unhappy? Boring? Too many hours? The people?
     
  5. rd400racer

    rd400racer Well-Known Member

    I could be a case study for you. As a matter of fact my timeline is earily (sp) similar to yours. After the military I went to school at night while working construction. The office staff of the construction company liked my work ethic/intelligence and moved me into the office. By the time I was 30 I made VP and became a part owner of said company. I never finished college because I had found my calling.

    By 45 I was so burnt out that I sold my share of the company and just did work on the side for 5 years, unfortunately sucking away at the money I made from the sale. Two kids in private school will do that. Luckily my wife has never had a problem finding a job and she landed a sweet corporate gig making great money. 5 years ago I went to work at another construction company making less than I did in the 90's but I'm totally content.

    I have come to learn that having time off to do the things I enjoy is worth way more than money. Of course you hit the Catch 22 of having enough money to do those things but I've found a happy balance and I don't sweat life nearly as much as I used to.
     
  6. Dave K

    Dave K DaveK über alles!

    Well, money CAN buy you happiness but happiness doesn't get you money.

    Keep your head down, Sock away the cash and look again when you have f@ck you money.
     
  7. SPL170db

    SPL170db Trackday winner

    Having disposable income makes me alot happier than having to pinch pennies and not able to partake in the activities I really enjoy that do in fact cost money. If your tastes are not costly (and I mean we all, well most, race motorcycles here and that shit ain't cheap) then your mileage may vary. But I know at this stage of the game I wouldn't take a big cut in pay to be happier with my job.

    Fortunately I'm pretty happy at my job and it pays decently enough :)
     
  8. StanTheMan

    StanTheMan Well-Known Member

    Money won't buy you happiness, it only affords you a better quality of misery. I was showrooms manager for a big furniture chain back in the late 80's, making (for that time) big money. I was miserable in my job. I ended up quitting and going back to school for nursing. Never been so happy as I am now. With the current nursing shortage I make stupid-money now too. Go for happiness.
     
  9. ryoung57

    ryoung57 Off his meds

    Use the money you make to simplify your life: pay off debt, secure savings, make investments, etc. Once you get yourself to a point that you don't require all the money you make, do something that makes you happy.

    Being stressed about paying your bills is way worse that putting up with your crappy job.
     
  10. Rob P

    Rob P Well-Known Member

    I suppose part of me considers it an end to a mean. Part of me says put up with the job, focus on hobbies,vac etc. the other part says it would be nice to go to a job you actually liked and challenged you.
     
  11. zertrider

    zertrider Waiting for snow. Or sun.

    Sounds familiar for me, but in my current situation, I am half owner of the company I work for, and it is a small family business. There are days when I want to walk away and just say F''k it. Working 6 days a week is not letting me do the things I want to do with my young kids. And with my wife working full time as well, everything always seems to be a rush/hectic around home. Yes we are both making good money, and we can afford to do lots of things, we just never make the time to do them. And the job just keeps becoming more stressful, which is not helping.
     
  12. HPPT

    HPPT !!!

    The minimum amount of money that can really buy you happiness is the amount you need to be able to quit and not have to work a job that makes you miserable. Otherwise, if you believe there's a level of income that can buy you happiness, you probably haven't had a job that you truly hated.
     
  13. deathwagon

    deathwagon Well-Known Member

    You're a man. You're supposed to suffer to make a better life for your wife and kids. Quit yer bitchin' and get back to work.
     
  14. Dave K

    Dave K DaveK über alles!

    Oh, I've had those jobs. Hated the people, hated the work and hated even the idea of going there. BUT, I still did it until I had an out.

    I've been broken than broke and that is the worst feeling I can remember. Having no pot to piss in.

    Edit: There is little that is as terrifying as being dirt poor again now with a wife and kid. Well, shitting my pants while I'm stuck in traffic is even scarier but poor is up there.
     
  15. sdg

    sdg *

    Money buys me things that offer moments of happiness. I'd just be more miserable without it....


    But yes, I'd be a lot happier making less money.

    But then I'd probably be bored.
     
  16. inpayne

    inpayne Well-Known Member

    I went through something similar very recently. Was in car sales, was top producer last year, I made more money than I knew what to do with. But I had a kid, and couldn't stomach the hours and the inability to live my life the way I wanted to. So I made a leap and started doing financial advising and planning with a good company. Its hard as hell to get started but I had internships and such in college, and it's something I've always wanted to get into so here I am. Now I make my own hours, I make a hell of a lot less money now, but who knows that should grow.

    Either way the way I think of it is, you spend a huge amount of your life working no point in being miserable while you are doing it.
     
  17. SPL170db

    SPL170db Trackday winner


    [​IMG]
     
  18. tophyr

    tophyr Grid Filler

    What specifically do you do, and what specifically do you hate about it?

    I'm in software; pretty much always have been. First job at 15, dropped out of college to work at Microsoft, etc. By the time I was 24, I burned out. I was working remotely in Ireland for a NYC-based startup, and I hadn't really realized that I hated the kind of work they had me doing. I just knew I didn't really ever want to work. I turned into a pretty crappy employee for the final few weeks until we had a come-to-Jesus moment when everyone - myself included - realized that I simply didn't care about the kind of work they needed me to do. We parted ways amicably, I traveled and fucked off for that summer and picked up industrial construction in the fall in order to keep ends meeting.

    That winter I finally got the urge to return to software, found a job, and was absolutely blown away by how much happier I was in that role than my previous one. I was doing, in theory, the same work - software is software, after all - but I was so much more interested in what I was building. What that taught me was that it wasn't necessarily the field that I hated/burned me out, it was what I'd been trudging through. Didn't hurt that I ended up making a lot more money with the new position, too.

    Maybe all you need is a different position and/or company, in the same field.

    edit: But, to answer your specific question, happiness. That's not even a question. We adjust our expenditures to match our income; sure you might not be able to blow $2k a race weekend but the guys out there spending nothing but entry fees to race their 1997 F3's on six-month-old takeoffs are having just as much fun.
     
    Last edited: Apr 2, 2015
  19. worthless

    worthless Well-Known Member

    4 years ago, I got burned out in my sales position from too much travel and chasing the absurd quotas. I took a job that cut my pay by a third. To this day, I don't regret it.
    You can't put a price tag on quality of life.
    I had to make adjustments. I couldn't buy a new motorcycle whenever I wanted. I couldn't go on baller vacations every year. I couldn't buy overpriced wines like I used to. I went from luxury cars to a Jeep.
    I picked up a few part time jobs for pissing-around money.
    It wasn't easy. Stuff that I thought I needed, I really didn't. Realized the difference between needs and wants.
    I'm so much more content with my life now.
     
  20. Sweatypants

    Sweatypants I am so smart! S-M-R-T... I mean S-M-A-R-T!

    amen.

    i just quit a job. i got paid decently, and my immediate team was actually kinda awesome. we joked a lot and the dudes were good at their jobs. the place however, was dysfunctional and toxic. groups didn't work together towards goals at all, every man for himself, it was stuffy and old school, and lacked investment in technology by leaps and bounds to the point of hindering the job at its core. i can honestly say these two things:

    1) never in my life before this job, have i pulled into the parking lot in the morning and dreaded even getting out of my car
    2) never in my life before this job, have i specifically told friends NOT to apply to open jobs there. going beyond not referring them, or complaining about the job like most people do sometimes... i flat out told them "do NOT apply here"

    besides being dysfunctional and toxic... i just had a 8 week span of working 55 hours a week. now to some people, they'd say "who cares" or "that's not a big thing". the thing is, to ME, its a HUGE deal. more than money. plus i'm not billing hours, so i don't get paid any more for doing it. i want my time, time is precious... i dont wanna work my life away just for a few more bucks. i had multiple offers over the years to work consulting and specifically turned down jobs because i didn't want that work schedule. i hadn't taken a day off since last summer which is unheard of for me, and i was totally burnt out, to the tune of my last paycheck is gonna included thousands of dollars of vacation time paid out in it. i was disgusted with myself for letting that happen. my job flat out begged/asked me what i wanted to stay, name anything. i said, "you cannot give me what i want/need."

    ironically enough, my new job is paying me a fair amount more money, and will also mostly just be a 40 hour week type place. after this job, i figure maybe one more salary jump... then i will strictly be working for work/life balance and personal happiness. no more chasing money at all. i just wanna ride my bike after work and hang out and take it easy. its worth more than any amount of money.
     

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