Discussion in 'The Dungeon' started by Steeltoe, Jan 15, 2019.
Unofficial gag order happened until the investigation is complete.
They just wanted to take my statement - they don’t have an HR department so the attorney investigates everything.
Good luck hope things go the best for you.
+1. Sorry you have to deal with it.
Thanks. The worst part about it is losing a piece of my life. I can't go back because the dynamic is changed radically.
I will put people in danger now because they will automatically be forced to think of my gender before the job. You are so far up each other's butts on a fire-scene, there is almost always some form of contact. I can't do that to them, they deserve to be able to do their job without an added complication. I did a good job for a long time blending in. It's an unfortunate but unavoidable consequence, and I am really pissed that someone I called a friend for the last decade got hammered enough to forget where his hands were in front of a ton of people.
So - I guess I am in the anger stage of grieving...
Don't let men be men (real men)?......another country with them will show up soon enough to take their places and you'll be in for a serious rude awakening. It's happening in Europe as we speak.
I was a Volunteer Fireman In TX before I moved 'north'. We had a few women on our squad- wasn't a problem. They all earned the right to be there just like I did. I'm really sorry anything like this has happened to you. In case you're wondering- I totally respect the fact that you have earned your right to be a firefighter, and you deserve to be there. Maybe if he wasn't so drunk- he might not have done that,- but STILL no excuse for his actions. I feel you were certainly right for reporting it, and while I respect your decision of no lawyer from what I've read so far- I too suggest one.
Again, I'm sorry anything like this has happened to you. I'm sure you didn't deserve this situation.
Good luck, stay strong
Having been a 'real firefighter' (just wasn't paid), all the training, coursework, etc., and being a male that has been on attack teams with women on them, I personally don't agree that you'd be putting anyone else in danger doing your job. What kind of a-hole would be thinking about gender when everyone is bunkered up and hooded and masked, etc.?
But, I totally respect your right to make decisions you are comfortable with. I'm just trying to give one males perspective that has been on a fire Dept. that also had woman members. No other guy I worked with ever thought it was a problem- to also have some woman on the squad.
If I knew you personally, I'd probably say to stay where you are and where you enjoy your job. This atmosphere will blow over, etc. After you get any type of apology, compensation, etc.- that you desire and you are comfortable with.
Good luck, just my 2 cents, I totally respect your right to do what you want to regarding this incident.
My gender was never a problem until it became one.
And as much support as people are giving me - I'm still going to be the one that got groped and reported it.
Being THE GIRL on a small town volunteer department has always been a bit odd. It sort of feels like infiltrating the boys club. I have worked hard to prove myself - and in the end - I am just another girl that caused problems even though I know I did absolutely nothing wrong.
I can't help feeling that way - It's an unfortunate down side to my early life lessons.
I just want him to get help with his drinking problem, I need no compensation.
You DIDN'T cause a problem, HE did. He should fry, be fired, etc.
Or he will go down as the perv that got drunk and attacked a lady.
I prefer this shaving company's message instead.
I guess I don’t understand but I’m not sure I should be able to. Do what you gotta do and at this point 2 fucks about his drinking problem and shame on him for his actions. Drinking has nothing to do with it, he’s a creeper regardless. I think he needs to get his groping problem squared away. I drink too much at times and not once have I ever had the inclination to cop a feel or rub up on anyone. I might give a couple of my buddies a tittle twister but hey, who doesn’t? LOL.
Just don't do that thing where you run up behind your buddy, take a knee, and jam two fingers up his ass.
That seems pretty sketchy to me.
Hmmm, never heard of this before but I’ll take your word for it as you seem to have some experience with it.
If you were more worldly you'd be familiar with it.
Friggin corn ranchers...
I mean, there's a famous statue and everything.
This. Unless CY was in a mini skirt and grinding on a bunch of people most will know that Pervy McPervert was way out of line.
Many women, from various cultures/religions/backgrounds with completely different social dynamics don't come forward after incidents like these. Some feel the same way CY does; feeling like they messed things up.
For the love of God stop feeling that way! You didn't do anything wrong, you were wronged. Any asshole, drunk or not, who would even consider doing that deserves every kind of repercussion he can get, a punch in the face, a kick to the groin, a loss of financial assets, a loss of face, etc. You did the whole team a favor because you pointed out the asshole who shouldn't have been their in the first place. As for the ladies who were wronged, they deserve a public apology, be acknowledged for their bravery to come forward when most women in their shoes wouldn't have.
Separate names with a comma.