Divorce help - God Damn Epidemic

Yep, yep. I hear you and agree. That would be a decent answer. I have no skin in this game. We're in a different place now with this 3-year thread. Or maybe places. From group hugs of commiseration to chest-thumps over forever-partners-found. There's entertainment at various people's expenses to lessons learned here. My divorce covers the spectrum but it's in the rear-view mirror.

This thread started out with a legitimate purpose (which I "think" has been achieved for the OP). That seemed not so long ago. One thing's for sure. The beeb doesn't disappoint.

 

Eh, you can have it. I have no need to bear witness to the endless scoldings from the desiccated reproductive organs of a non-parent, so enamored with her own sense of self righteousness that she feels entitled to treat all who don’t worship her enlightenment as though they are delinquent urchins.

She can fuck right off. I’ll continue to enjoy the silence.

 

Why don't you stop beating around the bush?

 

Hope you're at least paying for said reports with reach arounds.

 

They think they’re doing it out of the kindness of their hearts.

I think they’re doing it because they find the drama irresistible and are hoping for me to engage the enemy.

I just smile and nod. Life is so much better when you develop an immunity to their afflictions. Then they stop trying. Life’s peaceful now. Except when I have to pay a parenting consultant to spoon-feed a certain party on the importance of the children having breakfast before school, and endure emails with remedial lessons on how to buy food and provide it to hungry children. But hey, better hungry than eating soggy veggies, amiright?

 

I’m working on my assertiveness. It’s hard to overcome being such a timid, shrinking violet all these years.

 

Has he confirmed that he knows the proper way to stack firewood now?

 

I'm ambivalent about vegetable moisture content, but if you are feeding those kids soggy corn flakes, I will be staging a rescue operation.

 

Youngest digs on cold cereal. Read the box of a new cereal and asked for Raisin Brain. Eats her yogurt without much complaint. At least one rasher of bacon goes down with ease, sometimes a second and third.

Eldest will chow down on the bacon and eggs, but prefers pancakes or waffles or French toast. It’s a battle to get the yogurt into her. Not a huge fan of cold cereal, but will inhale rice porridge if it gets fruited or syrup/honey, or if I crumble bacon and poach an egg to throw in it.

They don’t leave my house wanting for anything in their bellies.

 

I'll be the judge of that! Just tell me the next time you're whipping something up and I'll swing by...you know, to make sure the food is edible and what not

 

Sooooo exactly how much effort is involved in cold cereal?

 

Considering the wee lass is proud as all get-out that she can serve herself, I find the effort needed to get her fed before she goes to school pretty minimal.

Others find the chore more challenging.

 

I was thinking about lopitt's request for a sample when I posted. Crumb Crunchers certainly have interesting culinary requests. One was challenging enough.

 

I wouldn’t call them interesting, so much as transitional. Like they both transitioned from loving bananas to not being able to stand the sight of them.

One thing is eternal, however. Mac & cheese.

 

Let them try French Toast with Peanut butter (unless they have nut allergies, or gluten intolerance, or a host of other maladies I never heard of way back when)

 

They’re over the gluten issue but the blonde one has a goober allergy. We have sunflower butter though, which ain’t too shabby.

Can’t keep a can of whipped cream in the house…I swear the kids are trying to build skyscrapers with it!

 

Can of whipped cream, Velveeta and pop tarts.

All the food groups are covered right there....

I'm pretty sure.

 

OMG...I just realized he's raising mini-Broomes.

 

Dear sweet Flying Spaghetti Monster help me if they turn out like @Gorilla George!

 

Well there's a lot of Kirk Van Houten energy to counter it too, sooooo...