PSA: Colonoscopy

My doc freaked out when I started asking questions. They had to double down on the knock out potion.

 

So I'm due again for my anal violation. For those that haven't been knocked out, how was it?

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They still give you drugs to make you not give a shit about much of anything so it's no big deal.
It was actually a very enjoyable buzz. It's the prep that sucks. When you're awake you can watch
the monitor and get a tour of your colon, literally what you would see if you had your head up your ass.

 

Propofol is the popular med for the typical colonoscopy today.
Out in 3 seconds, wide awake 30 minutes later. you won’t remember shit.
no lingering side effects.

 

That's what i had last time. I guess i was hilarious when i was coming out. I was in the middle of quite the motorcycle race the wife said. Lots of f-bombs.

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And sweet knowledge of sharing something common with Micheal Jackson.... Propofol was his goto stuffff!

 

When I was arguing for not getting knocked out, they told me they used Propofol. My immediate reply was "That's the stuff that killed Michael Jackson." They were NOT amused.

As for not being knocked out, it's pretty much nothing. The reason they knock you out is because most people are pretty anxious about having a 3ft hose (about 1/2" diameter) shoved up their butt. That anxiety makes the body act pretty poorly. If you can convince yourself it's nothing to be worried about, there is no point in being knocked out. Watching the inside of your colon on the monitor is pretty fascinating.

The actual invasion is pretty much a non-event. When I realized he was starting, by the time I looked at the monitor, the doc had the camera at the top of the descending colon and was rounding the curve into the transverse colon. Kind of like seeing the green flag drop, and being at Turn 1 before you really have a grip on the race.

If you are one of the ~15% of people who can feel pain in the colon, if they take a polyp out you will feel the pinch/pull. Other than that the only uncomfortable part was at the end, when they turn the camera to look at the inside of the anal opening. You feel a bit full, and the pressure can be uncomfortable. That part only takes a few seconds, however.

 

So here’s your million dollar idea: a rear facing rear end camera.

 

the anesthesia is primarily for any procedures that may be necessary once inside the patient. Biopsy, imbedded gerbil removal, lost butt plug removal, sutures, and dozens of other things that could possibly be necessary while scoping around.

some folks try to save a few bucks by not having any anesthesia.
Some folks are scared shitless of being put under.

you can’t be scared shitless during a colonoscopy, you have no shit at this point.

 

The perforation rate is a little more than 1 in 300 procedures. The rest of the stuff you mentioned won't be necessary, as the prep for a colonoscopy will have removed anything you put in your butt since the day you were born. I've already covered the tissue samples taken for biopsy.

Most people get knocked out because they are "scared shitless" of having someone put something in their butt. Also a foolish thing to be scared of, since all your shit was removed the night before by the prep.

And if they do poke a hole in your insides, you won't know it unless you are in the 15% who have pain receptors in your colon.

There really isn't a good medical reason to knock you out for this procedure. Anesthesia for this procedure is an unnecessary drug use, with possible serious complications.

And if you don't have a driver on call to take you home, it's a real PITA.

 

I saw a video once of a woman wearing a butt plug with a laser in it. It shot laser beams from her butt.

 

Believe it is about the “cheek clenching effect” more than anything. When you are knocked out, no clenching.

 

Robby is taking care of all the questions I have. Lol thanks bud.

 

So they do end up poking a hole in more than 1 out of 300?? Wow That will be the one time I win with such odds. So if they do this does that mean they then cut you open to fix it??

 

I was diagnosed with UC in 1990 so I've had more than my share of colonoscopies. Everybody feels pressure in their colons and that is what is so painful. Worse than the worst case of cramps you've ever had, particularly when the doc is making a turn. A perforated colon is not a minor problem. The snake is about 6 or 7 feet long.

 

Your colon has no "feeling" at all, if you touch it you get no sense from it of being touched. I had a
temporary colostomy and you have to touch it a lot so I know this firsthand. While you may not feel
a perforation you will sure as hell feel it when the contents of your colon enter your abdominal cavity.
It feels like having boiling water dumped into your abdomen.

 

My buddy had that happen. You go straight to surgery. Serious problem but fixable. They have to open you up.

 

No sure why no driver would cause this pain. Is it only at the rectum?

 

Ive had 3 of these procedures and not during any of them was I given the option to not have the propofol. The anesthesia is discussed in the pre-surgical meetings and it’s on all of the paperwork that requires a signature, which is all of it.

You must be a tough guy.

Me, I’d rather be sleeping when I get butt fucked so I don’t remember the experience.
Anybody that’s ever had a GI issue can tell you that the colon feels pain and pressure.

Did you have yours done in Guatemala or or with a mud hut Doctor in Ethiopia?

 

How were they able to find your ass, you being such a giant cunt?