Open or Poly relationships - why aren't there more?

Discussion in 'The Dungeon' started by beac83, Dec 23, 2018.

  1. lee955i

    lee955i The Traveling Gnome

    Just my opinion in the context of a current committed relationship/marriage. What single people (of either sex) do to get their freak on is fine (and welcomed;)). Hell, I'd do it but I may be one of the few people alive with less "Game" than 'Toe !!! :crackup::crackup::crackup:
    TurboBlew likes this.
  2. Banditracer

    Banditracer Dogs - because people suck

    I think it's human nature to get bored sexually after being in a monogamous relationship for a long time. Both men and women.

    It's obviously not the same for everyone, that's kind of what the swinger / swapping scene is about. Open, above board playing with no strings. But I bet jealousy creeps in sometimes.
  3. SPL170db

    SPL170db Trackday winner

    Yup.....whether they are married to men or to other women....the data substantiates that women are way more commitment-phobic and divorce prone than men are collectively.

    Between 2004 and 2009, the average annual divorce rate for all homosexual marriages was almost 2% (the total rate of divorce over those 5 years was 11%) Also between 2004 and 2009, lesbian divorce rates were nearly double of those of gay men.[15]

    As of 1997, the same-sex partnership divorce rate was significantly lower than that of heterosexual couples in Denmark. The vast majority of gay marriages in Denmark are male-male. Fourteen (14) percent of these end in divorce, compared to 23 percent of female marriages. The higher rate for lesbians (almost double), is consistent with data showing that women initiate most of the heterosexual divorces in Denmark.[16]

    In the Netherlands, slightly more marriages between women are recorded than between men: between 2006-2011 on average 690 and 610 per year respectively.

    The lesbian divorce rate is much higher than the divorce rate between men: in the same period on average 100 women and 45 men divorced per year (i.e., Lesbian divorce rate = 14%, Gay Male divorce rate = 7%).[17]

    A study tracking married couples over a 10 year span found lesbian marriages were most likely to end in divorce. Of the 580 lesbian couples who were married in 2005, 30% were divorced ten years later compared to 18% for heterosexual couples and 15% for gay male couples.[18]

    A study on short-term same-sex registered partnerships in Norway and Sweden found that divorce rates were 50% lower for same-sex couples than opposite-sex marriages,[19] and that unions of lesbians are considerably less stable, or more dynamic, than unions of gay men.[20]
    In the above study, lesbians divorce risks were 10% higher than for gay men (Table 4).

    The divorce rate of same-sex couples within 29 months of the introduction of legally binding civil partnerships was slightly less than one percent in the United Kingdom.[21]
    As of 2013, lesbian couples were twice as likely to initiate actions to end legally recognized partnerships as compared to gay men.[22] in 2016, married female couples were approximately 2-1/2 times more likely to divorce than male couples.[23]
  4. L8 Braker

    L8 Braker 'Murica

  5. Clay

    Clay Well-Known Member

    Well guess I was wrong! Pretty crazy. I thought women were ever so hung up on being faithful and long term crap. Two of them together and I'd think that'd be a match made forever. Learn something new every day.
  6. Lawn Dart

    Lawn Dart Difficult. With a big D.

    No, see, they want a partner that's faithful and long term... Until that's boring and no longer a challenge for them, then they need some excitement. Partner still needs to be faithful though. They gotta have stability... :D
  7. SPL170db

    SPL170db Trackday winner


    Everything is always [straight/white] men's fault is the agreed upon narrative of liberals and progressives.
    Fonda Dix likes this.
  8. Spang308

    Spang308 Well-Known Member

    Why is none of this surprising? The left loves open shit. Relationships, borders...what's the difference?
    SpeedyE likes this.
  9. brex

    brex Well-Known Member

    But they hate open economies, open school choice, etc.
  10. Phl218

    Phl218 Lemme ask my wife

    Men want to bang, women want feelings.

    If that is desired outside of an existing partnership, men bang and done. Unless there is a desire for emotional involvment. Women OTOH, look for fulfiment, with the bang as a side product. But the “desire for love” is what messes things up.
    crashman likes this.
  11. In Your Corner

    In Your Corner It's a little-known fact...

  12. Fonda Dix

    Fonda Dix Well-Known Member

    Another case of using the “animal kingdom”’ when it benefits the narrative.

    No, human are not just like other animals. Our intelligence burdens is with much more complexity.
    SpeedyE likes this.
  13. SGVRider

    SGVRider Well-Known Member

    Long term heterosexual monogamy is the most egalitarian and optimal system for raising children and maintains social harmony. So society created moral, religious, and cultural structures to encourage it. If society didn’t enforce monogamy, George Clooney would have a harem of 500 chicks and deprive 499 other men of a mate.

    I’d say more people don’t do it because Western society is relatively egalitarian. I think it can only work when the power balance is unequal or both parties have very compelling economic/social/political motivation to keep the marriage going. IE, the political power couple or the very wealthy man with 20 girlfriends. Joe and Jane your neighbors? It won’t work.
    Chino52405 likes this.
  14. SGVRider

    SGVRider Well-Known Member

    The animal kingdom is an excellent model for what systems of behavior evolve and become meta stable in historical environments. It’s a poor model in that they always make the tacit assumption that animal behavior modalities are driven exclusively or primarily by biology. I’d argue animal behavior is also driven in large part by economics, just as our behavior is.
  15. SpeedyE

    SpeedyE Experimental prototype, never meant for production

  16. Potts N Pans

    Potts N Pans Well-Known Member

    Most people cant handle someone sharing themselves with others. Friendships end over way less. Once trust is conpromised, there is no turning it around.

    We are needy and greedy!
    SpeedyE and Phl218 like this.
  17. jrsamples

    jrsamples Banned

    That sucks. Someone ought to talk some sense into them. Hooter fixation.
    SpeedyE likes this.
  18. Phl218

    Phl218 Lemme ask my wife

  19. ryoung57

    ryoung57 Off his meds

    On one hand, monogamy fosters that "get in line/follow the rules/accept control" mentality so preferred by our overlords, on the other, it does provide for a more stable, if not boring, life. Honestly, most people aren't strong enough mentally or emotionally to truly be in an open relationship. What's much more likely is that it's a symptom of an unhealthy, co-dependent relationship where two people are too intertwined to function on their own so they accept the screwing around and find some way to justify or even it out. It's not just sex. People do it with money, child rearing, and a host of other things common to a relationship.

    I think the reason you see it challenged so much by the left is that it's seen as a form of control, and their goal seems to be to challenge EVERYTHING supported by conservatives or any sort of authority, regardless of whether it's actually beneficial.
  20. Mongo

    Mongo Administrator

    Overall I'm with you. Plenty of relationships that work with no sex, if you're open and up front about it then I could see it working. The only issue I could see is the time thing - especially on the end of the women moreso than the men but obviously some men as well get freaky about their SO spending time with other people.

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