Some f@cking thing is digging holes and little tunnels in my POS front postage stamp of a yard! It has to be a large mole or something like that. I'm getting a claw hammer and going to sit out there and when that f@cking things sticks it's head up, I'm gonna rail road spike that f@cker to China!
Need to borrow a husky? I have two that have some sort of jihad against moles. They've never killed anything else, only moles.
Man, can I relate to this... Last summer I was in the same situation, but my yard is a bitchin' Emerald Zoysia (came w/ the house people, chill...). One day a good ol boy buddy of mine was over and saw the war zone. I was about to go all Bill Murray/Caddy Shack on these little B's. I mention to my friend that I've lived here for 15 yrs and never had a problem. He points to my 20 yr old cat and says "There's your problem, you need a younger cat!" He was definitely right; the supply of little mole heads left on the front porch had dwindled over the last year or so. I ended up sticking my garden hose into the holes and went around filling 'em all up. Drowned the bah-stids. Oh yeah, prior to that I tried hooking up a hose from my truck's exhaust pipe, but that didn't seem to work. Maybe I shoulda revved it up a bunch.
Amazing...Same thing happened with us...Came home from work one day and the back porch looked like Kurtz's compound off of, "Apocolypse Now," severed mole heads littered the ground everywhere...
Don't hit 'em to hard. Maybe you can make a nice hat out of 'em. http://www2.timesdispatch.com/rtd/news/state_regional/article/GUINGAT12_20100312-065001/329968/
I have two outside cats that hang out. Neighbor cat who is about 270 years old and Buckwild who is a big dumb lover cat. F@ckers better get to eating moles or the free food train is going on stirke. Oh, can't use the hose on the moles. The replacement for the one I cut with the hedge trimmer broke and I'm not buying one today.
Claw hammer: $19.95 Fine lawn chair with umbrella: $49.95 Video of DaveK playing whack-a-mole on his lawn: Priceless Note: Posting video of DaveK playing whack-a-mole in general will still get you banned. No warranty made or implied, your results may vary, Yuengling not included.
Get some black snakes and hog nose snakes. they'll eat em all. I have snakes all over my yard in the summer and they take care of things. If you're one of those that's afraid of snakes then forget it.
Like one of the commenters on that page said, why is it ok to make a hat out of a racoon but illegal to make one out of a guinea pig? For that matter, would it be illegal to make a mole skin hat?
Dave....tell me where you live. I'll drop off my Cat 345 excavator. It weights 46 metric tons, has a 54 inch bucket and will dig 24 feet deep. I guarantee I can get that little bastard. (you might have to re-seed the grass, this thing tends to be messy!)
If you travel to South America, you can have guinea pig for lunch! I can just see Dave standing there proudly in his pink moleskin hat. Question is, is he a pork-pie kind of guy? Maybe a cool fedora. Perhaps a nice Panama hat with a snazzy ribbon.
Pete, one or two swipes of the bucket on that thing would trench my entire front yard. I was thinking about using my propane tank and a simple attachment and fill the holes full of gas and then detonating it remotely. Worked on the VC, it'll work on moles.
I swear DaveK is the funniest mufukka alive! His threads never dissapoint. I did learn something new though, that cats will eat moles. Thought they only ate mice!
They don't eat them, they catch them and gift you with them on your porch, all laid out in a nice little row.
Alexa, I'd make a f@cking banana hammock out of their corpses and wear it and it alone (maybe some sneakers and some jackie O sunglasses) to the mall! Worship me! For I am the mole slayer, god of WAR!!!!
