1. This site uses cookies. By continuing to use this site, you are agreeing to our use of cookies. Learn More.

Divorce help - God Damn Epidemic

Discussion in 'General' started by zx6rfool, Sep 14, 2018.

  1. StaccatoFan

    StaccatoFan My 13 year old is faster than your President

    "The best way to stick it to your ex"

    Another way is to "stick it" to one or more new targets of opportunity (we shall call them). If she finds out...cool. If she doesn't, when you see her at a hearing or some other
    situation where you cross paths, she'll either understand or wonder why you're so damned happy.
     
  2. zx6rfool

    zx6rfool Stacks Wood

    *update* on Child Support, was able to confer with some lawyers, friends of friends, and one really took their time ans walked through the documents with me. The separation agreement holds with the divorce decree, but the divorce decree has a statement turning over the case to Juvinile and Domestic Relations court (Key, as with out this statement I would have been held to the terms in the separation agreement). In VA every 3 years CS can be revisited, or if there is a change in circumstance (new job, job loss, change of 25% in income, etc). So I just got back from the courthouse, filing paperwork. No hiring of a lawyer necessary, they are backed up a few weeks but by summer I should be free and clear of CS!
     
    motion, Rugbydad, Razr and 1 other person like this.
  3. zx6rfool

    zx6rfool Stacks Wood

    *update* After filing I got served with a July court date, much later than expected, but progress.
    That was a week ago, today I was contacted by a court mediator.

    I did not get the warm and fuzzies. She seemed to know all the details, unless they helped me. She knew I was looking to remove child support (and when she said it I could hear the discust, like I was a dead beat dad), and adjust out of pocket medical to 50/50.

    But she didnt know that I have the kids half the time, even though those items are on the same court work sheet, one line apart.

    It felt like an interrorgation, and she did not like me, until informed her that I was concerned about the x hiding income because she might not report how many businesses she has, and her sucess as a RE agent, and how thats documented with awards etc.
    I also mentioned that Im not looking to get any $, she is doing better than me. Im not looking for fair, I just want to not pay someone who makes more than me. The mediators tone lightened, but I still live in VA where the man is the devil and with a very well connected x, a female mediatorc, and a female judge, I feel like a sitting duck.

    Its also a balancing act, the x still has of yet not removed my name from the property she is in. Finally, after 4 years, she filed the paperwork, but there is the concern that removing the CS will impact her application. Its a transfer of title, and her lack of income prevented it until now. I tell you, after the divorce, she was happy with her sugar daddy, and my supliment, because it want her income; until he want to jail and my supliment wasnt enough, all of a sudden she found a way to make her own $, lots of it, well now I get to remove the supliment and keep my $. This is a woman with a BA, and a BS, three minors, and a MS. I am doing my best to raise our daughter to not be her mother.
     
    YamahaRick, Gino230 and Clay like this.
  4. Hyperdyne

    Hyperdyne Indy United SBK

    If you have an attorney, why is the mediator contacting you directly, and not them? And same question, if the mediator has questions, those should be received and acknowledged by counsel, not by you directly?
     
    Yzasserina likes this.
  5. Razr

    Razr Well-Known Member

    I think the mediators are there to help the case along without the cost and time associated with an attorney. At $500 an hour, I would drag it out as long as I could also.
     
  6. Hyperdyne

    Hyperdyne Indy United SBK

    The mediators are involved (at least in my state) to encourage settlement prevent the case from going in front of a judge. The reason for the question was his feeling that the mediator was somewhat biased. Technically that meeting could take place with or without an attorney if you wish, to save cost.

    It's just somewhat baffling because in terms of CS, it's usually a worksheet that both parents complete with income numbers, then adjust for custodial/non-custodial and who pays the insurance. Some states purely make that process a PITA. And while yes, there a re plenty of deadbeat parents, he doesn't come across that way. Just wants what is fair.
     
  7. pickled egg

    pickled egg Tell me more

    He’s pro-se, so the mediator would contact him directly.
     
  8. Hyperdyne

    Hyperdyne Indy United SBK

    Makes sense then.
     
  9. Razr

    Razr Well-Known Member

    He did say the mediators tone changed when they learned more about his ex's finances.
     
  10. ToofPic

    ToofPic Well-Known Member

    I would most likely eat hot lead if I had to go through what you poor sob's are with this shit. I was married for over 30 yrs,and luckily our son was grown when she decided to test ride dick at her workplace. Fuck getting married!@ Ever! You can seal a marriage in minutes,and spend years trying to get out of it with any form of sanity! Dont!!!! Of course unless " you" can financially benefit if someone shits the bed.." unlikely"
     
    motion, Rebel635 and Rico888 like this.
  11. ClemsonsR6

    ClemsonsR6 Well-Known Member

    Hmmm, that's a bit strange.....30 years and then decided to step out or this was the first time you caught it?
     
    Rebel635 likes this.
  12. ToofPic

    ToofPic Well-Known Member

    Potato..Potatoh..Either way,you can't Un-fuck something..Its only strange when your looking in from the outside..People change,sometimes they even think they missed something,only to find out that grass aint so green.I would never give anyone that type of reign in my life again ever.Im sure the signs were there at some point,but no,it didnt start out with infidelity.Most of those 30 yrs were what a good mariage should have been.
     
  13. HPPT

    HPPT !!!

  14. motion

    motion Nihilistic Member

    Its the most insane, idiotic, one sided agreement ever, yet otherwise intelligent men still do it. Sometimes, over and over. Sure, there are valid reasons, but nothing a quick hop to Asia and $60 can't fix.
     
    ToofPic likes this.
  15. motion

    motion Nihilistic Member

  16. Razr

    Razr Well-Known Member

    I think so. Those hidden assets will be easy to find.
     
  17. motion

    motion Nihilistic Member

    Judges typically don't rule favorably towards someone who has blown their credibility by trying to be tricky and out-smart the judicial system. May end up costing him dearly.

    In my case, it all came down to credibility, since valuation of my assets was the primary contention point of the case. Without a forensic account in the picture, the judge has to believe the most credible party.
     
    ToofPic and Razr like this.
  18. StaccatoFan

    StaccatoFan My 13 year old is faster than your President

    And the WHaaaaaaa-men will ALWAYS try to seek some over-inflated outrageous unbelievable value for everything contested in a divorce.

    Even though though the comps of your house in your development all sell for $250K, magically your house is worth $500K in the divorce based on her estimates.

    So you, the estranged husband come in with an actual market appraisal.

    Happens way too much.
     
  19. motion

    motion Nihilistic Member

    Funny you mention that. My ex and her attorney found a realtor in town who signed a document saying she would list the house at $920K if it were to go up for sale. Zillow and the appraisal I paid for both said $650K. Whooops... there goes all your credibility.
     
  20. Clay

    Clay Well-Known Member

    If my wife and I ever divorced and she somehow acted like this, I would cancel my insurance, set everything on fire, then put a bullet through my brain.

    I can't imagine what some of you guys have gone through. Women be crazy, but thankfully my wife knows this and has acted accordingly.
     
    ToofPic likes this.

Share This Page