Can I get your opinion on a bad woman?

Some of ya may or may not know I lost my wife if 28 years 5 years ago to cancer. I spent 2 years in a grey cloud, Then met a woman whom seemed absolutely wonderful. She really does have some sweet attributes. But as this relationship has progressed..she's shown some awful, & vile behavior

I'm a simple man, and just get by, only by working very hard.
She has smoked 420 more than likely every day since she was 13 she's now 52. She drinks whiskey and although can be a functional alcoholic even after a few..but it only takes one drink however to make her mean combative confrontational and argumentative.

She has not worked in 20 years plus her ex-husband took care of everything pretty much as I have been.
As mentioned I don't make a lot of money but I help her out as often as possible as she's always crying poor... EVEN THOUGH SHE BOUGHT A HOUSE FOR 150K 5 YEARS AGO AND NOW HE'S GONE UP TO NEARLY $700,000 IN THE CALIFORNIA MARKET she makes up all kinds of excuses why she can never go to work she can't even pay the taxes on her home.
After almost 4 years I'm down a good $20,000 from my savings.. my saving is all I had after losing my home during my wife's battle with cancer.
I'm pretty much one to accept somebody's past especially if I love them her last is pretty salacious though including multiple cheating on her ex-husband and a pregnancy as a result this I just recently found out.
Now in my heart I think I know the answer... I've just never been on my own I'm in my 50s and unfortunately the heart wants What It wants I do love her but this is proving to be very hard I live in an area where there are not many people to meet... I'm still on my hind feet financially from everything that happened during my wife's illness..
I guess I have a question...
Are there women out there that are truly just bad and almost evil even without alcohol I'd like to think the alcohol and the constant exposure to marijuana over the course of a lifetime has created the person that I am dealing with I honestly don't think she will ever get help as she absolutely adamantly claims she has no alcohol problem whatsoever.
I am a loyal hard-working honest guy and she projects all these bad thoughts on to me that I am constantly cheating on her there's no trust that I'm an alcoholic, IM not.. I do drink but I'm a happy Irishman and like to have fun if we're dancing etc.. but I'm not a mean drinker not by any stretch.. it's just for fun and I'm responsible.
I'm an average guy I like to do fun things I'm in better than average shape and look a little more useful than my age I like 80s metal rock and roll and everything else 70s 80s and early 90s... lol
She claims I'm a liar and every other bad thing that you can think of.... Just last week her daughter was visiting they got in a fight they're both f***** up and kicked her daughter out so I let her daughter stay at my house until she could get back to San Diego her daughter is 30 years old and she's claiming that I've been sleeping with her daughter
I JUST CANNOT BELIEVE THAT A WOMAN CAN BE THIS CRUEL AND HARSH HAVE ANY OF YOU EVER HAD AN EXPERIENCE LIKE THIS OR AM I JUST THE UNLUCKY ONE I'M NOT STUPID ABOUT THIS BUT MY HEART HAS BEEN A STRONGER THAN MY BRAIN..
PROBABLY AS I DON'T WANT TO LOSE ANYBODY AGAIN AND SCARED OF BEING ALONE...I'M JUST TRYING TO FIND SOME ANSWERS IN A BAD TIME..
Really am I that ignorant..that there are possibly just rotten women out there, or possibly mentally unstable?
She did not exhibit this behavior from the start at least not all of it... AND IF YOU'RE A GRIFTER WHY WOULD A WOMAN PICK SOMEBODY LIKE ME I'M NOT RICH I'M NOT WELL TO DO I'M NOT EVEN CLOSE WHY WOULD A WOMEN PICK ME TO PULL WINGS OFF A FLY?

Man O' Man this is Fcke'd up??

Thanks in advance for any input and advice

 

You need to run boss...life is too short.

 

Run, don’t walk. Watching F1 now, more later.

 

Dude.

Take that teensiest of teenie-weenie nest eggs you have and get yourself into therapy.

This post has more red flags than a wet B session at NESBA.

 

There are worse things than being alone. Your current situation is one of those things. I don't know what to tell you to do that's going to fill the void left by your late wife but this woman isn't it. Just my opinion.

 

I couldn’t agree more.

Don’t stay with a shitty person just for the sake of not being alone.

There is nothing wrong with being by yourself. You need to be able to by happy with and by yourself, rather than seeking other people for happiness.

Once you are happy with and by yourself, you can (and will) be much more selective in who you choose to spend time with. If someone is in your life, it should be because you WANT them to be there, because they add value and enjoyment.

 

Ideally, yes. But what I really had in mind was that even if he can't find happiness by himself, it still beats being made miserable by another person. Don't stay in a situation like what he describes just because you will not be happy on your own.

 

ive been in bad realtionships, ive been alone, and im now in a GREAT relationship...i never wouldve made it to the great one if i stayed in the bad one, and the great one likely wouldnt be as great if i didnt fully know (and she does as well) that i am absolutely fine on mine own...im here by choice. you arent a tree dude, you can move from your current position. and imo you'll likely be better off.

 

RUN!!!…………is the daughter nice?

 

Don’t ask questions you already know the answers to.

 

Ditch her asap and get yourself a dog for company.

 

You already said it, you know it.

So let me add, however bad it is now, it will get worse. You've been around enough to know this. You're not a teen or idiot 20 something anymore. Leave now!

 

Great advice above. Get out. Hopefully you can learn to be happy by yourself and with some friends.

There are crazy men and women
everywhere. You can also find good ones, maybe look for someone like you, that has lost their significant other. Someone that has proven they can value a long term relationship.

 

If she's already accusing you of cheating, might as well go have a little fun....

Seriously though, sounds horrible. Move on and find someone worthy of your affection.

 

I'm pretty sure the primary driver of her behavior is the constant exposure to marijuana.

You fix that and all will be well.

 

You really need advice on this?

 

Reefer madness?!? Really?

No.

 

Cut bait and move on.

 

More likely that the weed is the only thing keeping her mellow, without it she'd probably kill him in his sleep. Mean drunks can kill.