Okay time to liven things up a bit with some jokes!

Oh yeah, there was that too.

 

Meh

 

- ow?

 

Isn't it targeting Libertarians?

 

Libertarians have a party?

Wouldn't that be like atheists having a religion?.....

 

Ya but they're not political by definition, so that by default makes the joke not political .

 

Umm.
Libertarian Party (United States) - Wikipedia

 

Please, no bad blood on this one. (a couple of Angry Hockey Dads on this BBS)

 

A young couple rents a cabin for a week on a lake for their honeymoon. As they arrive they are met by an older gentleman who shows them where the fresh sheets are and how to use the fireplace and such. He bids them well and drives off to his home on the other side of the lake.

A week later, as the couple are packing up their car, the older man returns. He pulls the young man aside and says "Young man, I've seen you out on that lake fishing every day from sunrise to sunset, and then half the night even by lantern. You said this was your honeymoon. You should be doing what young couples do." The young man replies "she has Gonorrhea ." The old guy looks at him and says, "Well, that's tough but she can give you head." To which the young man replies. "No, she has Pyorrhea also." The gentleman recoils a bit and then says. "Well, you can at least take her from behind." The young man tells him "No, I can't do that either, she has Diarrhea." The old man looks him in the eye his and says "Son, that's just awful. Why did you marry her?" The young man smiles and says, "She has worms too, and I love to fish."

 

Cringeworthy

 

When I die, bury me with a chair.

















So rigor mortis can set in.

 

A guy goes to the supermarket and notices an attractive woman waving at him.

She says hello. He's rather taken aback because he can't place where he knows her from

So he says, "Do you know me?" To which she replies, "I think you're the father of one of my kids."

Now his mind travels back to the only time he has ever been unfaithful to his wife and says, "My God, are you the stripper from my bachelor party that I made love to on the pool table with all my buddies watching while your partner whipped my butt with wet celery?"

She looks into his eyes and says calmly, "No, I'm your son's teacher."

 

Dear expecting parents -

When you are deciding on what to name your upcoming little bundle of joy, for God's sake, please, I beg you, stop and take a moment to ponder what your chosen moniker will be when it is spelled out backwards.

Sincerely -

Marlana

 

School will be lleh....

 

Four years is ridiculously out of bounds. You know what? I'm declaring this thread and the Oddball Picture thread to be out of my jurisdiction. I think it dampens participation if a poster has to review the posts over the past six months before they post without fear of getting bitch popped.
The whole idea of bitch popping was to nail those who literally posted right on top of somebody else, or started a thread on a current topic without seeing if somebody else did so first. As the wise man at the Fisher Body school once told me, "I'm not here to pick fly shit off the screen door."
You guys whine all you want, but no official action will be taken be me.

 

I say 48 hours is a good statute of limitations. Unless it's big racing news. Then, unlimited.

 

A gas station owner was trying to increase his sales, so he put up a sign that read, "Free Sex with Fill-Up." Soon a local Texas redneck pulled in, filled his tank, and asked for his free sex. The owner told him to pick a number from 1 to 10. If he guessed correctly he would get his free sex. The Texan guessed 8, but the proprietor said, "You were close. The number was 7. Sorry. No sex this time."
A week later, the same redneck, along with his brother, Jimmy, pulled in for another fill-up. Again he asked for his free sex.
The proprietor again gave him the same story, and asked him to guess the correct number. The Texan guessed 2. The proprietor said, "Sorry, it was 3. You were close, but no free sex this time." As they were driving away, the Texan said to his brother, "I think that game is rigged! He doesn't really give away free sex." Jimmy replied, "No! It ain't rigged! My wife won twice last week."

 

Took ya 5 months to come to that conclusion?



Truthfully, I think I just wanted to justify reposting my own more betterer version of the same joke. Invoking you was just a good cover.