That last one reminds me of a clerk in a liquor store I used to patronize years ago. I went in one day and he was wearing a cast on his arm while running the cash register. On the sling his arm was in was a sign that said "I fell down, don't ask how".
Kid I went to HS with - if you really made him angry, he’d pull his fake leg (from below the knee) off and throw it at you.
Yep, that was him. Only it took a nanosecond for that thing to come off and fly. Was awesome when the recipient had no idea he was missing a leg until that very moment. As for you, did you or a loved one recently lose a limb? Are you printing these in your basement?
120,000 mile bmw? I'm surprised they don't have people lined up around the block to buy it. (Or burnt it)