thought we were the only one....the boy...sigh, every night....the girl...all done earlier than its due...and yes they are twins.
There is definitely enough blame to go around and neither the parents or the education system is without blame. I just think that parents need to admit their own shortcomings shoulder some of the blame if their kid is a shithead. I am just glad that I do not have to deal with any of this any more.
Its funny cause there is no hiding anymore with online grades. With online powerschool I can see homework grades, test grades and overall grades of his classes. Real-time. So I can keep the pressure on him if he is starting to fall in one class. I would have hated that crap when I was growing up. So different now. There is no surprises for sure. If the parent gives two shits about their kid they can monitor progress throughout the year and get the kid help if they are falling behind.
Not a comment aimed at you, but this quote struck me. The anxiety these kids feel is very real. (Edit: the only anxiety I ever felt as a kid was walking in to a test/quiz that I knew about and chose not to study for, but I also knew it was my own fault. It's not the same as somebody else constantly looking over your shoulder. ) Am I a terrible parent if I watch my kid fail? Am I a terrible teacher if I watch my student fail?
When the kid is alone in the world, the parent can not be there, a good parent should not want their kid to lean on them the entire time. This is the conundrum. These are the extremes: becoming a helicopter parent, or allowing your kid to fail. Today's kids are not allowed to fail, in school, or even socially, where everything is being recorded, e.g. today, if you trip and fall on your face, there is no story, but a video that can be repeated over and over. Then the kid has to re-live the embarrassment every time. We can tell great stories about our childhood, today's kids can not, this has become Truman's World.
Not a teacher so I'm not going to pretend to know how to approach it. But regarding parents, I think a lot of your proposed situation (which is obviously very real for many) is heavily dependent on age. K-8, I'd say let them fail, depending on how they are failing. If you see they are doing the work but are simply struggling, offer to help and make sure they know to reach out for help, whether to you, their teacher, or some other resource while also reinforcing that you will not do the work for them, but you will help them understand how to do the work. Best thing you can teach someone is how to help themselves. However, if you are seeing zeros, I'd let it be then apply consequences as necessary. My parents always told me that I had a job, just like them and that job was school. As such, performing at a high level was rewarded. However, failure meant those rewards disappeared. So if they are failing due to laziness, then let them fail and provide consequences accordingly so they understand how their approach will affect them in the real world. High school is probably a bit different approach and I'd say probably requires a weird mixture of more monitoring but less direct action. By the time they're teenagers, they've probably developed learning/studying/work habits that aren't going to change as easily or quickly and we all know teenagers know everything. Takes more of a guiding hand to slowly instill corrections to bad habits. They just aren't as immediately moldable or impressionable. And the problem is high school is obviously the most critical to their future, especially if that future involves college. No one cares what happened before high school. Hopefully by then you've already instilled the work ethic and study habits they need.
AS either a teacher or a parent, you should probably figure out why the student/child is failing. Sometimes teachers and parents put a kid in a situation where failure is there only option. If a kid says, "I can't do this" maybe they are telling the truth and telling them to try harder or do more repetitions isn't going to make them any more successful. Try looking for a root cause and adjusting the requirements to meet their needs. As we have seen, some kids are thriving in the home school environment and others need the structure of the classroom. Just be aware that one size does not fit all when it comes to learning. I think that is one of the major faults of the current educational system.
Interesting responses. district published a plan to have everyone back in the classroom full time by Presidents’ Day. But everyone has a plan until they get punched in the mouth.
