Need another medical translation.

I think my body is falling apart. Back in November, I missed the bottom step getting off the Amtrak train in Atlanta.

Anyway, here's the MRI notes:

1. Contusions in the medial tibial plateau associated with osteophyte formation.
2. Marked narrowing of the medial knee joint compartment.
3. Mildly displaced anterior horn medial meniscus.
4. Undersurface tear posterior horn medial meniscus.
5. ACL strain.
6. Strain in the patellar insertion of the quadriceps and the patellar tendon.
7. Strain in the tibial insertion of the patellar tendon.
8. Strain in the medial and lateral patellar retinacular attachment.
9. Joint effusion, Popliteal cyst.

 

Translation= your knee hurts

 

I got chop blocked a few months back and actually went to the doctor. Blown out knee? Blown out tendons and meniscus? I had a stroke?

doctor, who was a friend told me “you’re older, quit trying to be 30 and. . . You’re too fucking fat, you smoke too much and you drink too much! Lose weight and quit smoking. I’ll check in on you in a month overs beers.” Douche bag doctor, could have been nicer, I’m not old!

Big D, you’re old! lose some weight, quit smoking and I’ll check in next month over beers.

 

Thanks.

I might lose a few pounds, but I'll still share my smokes with you.

 

Did you fall on your shoulder??!!!

 

Sounds messed up! Heal up dude!

 

How much movement are you getting with the trucker lifestyle? Honest question because I probably walked a hundred steps a day when I did it. Now I don’t have those problems at all.

Kind of off topic but I actually ended my driving “career” with an ACL reconstruction and a fuck you to the company I hated working for while getting it covered on their insurance plan. I let the dicks know I was quitting after the 3 month rehab.

 

No.

 

Not enough.

 

A hysterectomy will fix you right up.

 

You have a tear in your meniscus. If it is causing the knee to lock or click or bad pain, they would likely scope you to clean it up.

1, 2 and 9 on your list mean your raced carbureted motorbikes (you're old).

Hope this helps. Miss you my friend!

 

Miss you, too.

 

Got the official translation today:

Knee replacement.

 

Get a second opinion

 

He needs a paper bag over his face, too.

 

Agreed. Especially depending on current age.

 

That was My main reason for saying that

 

that’s how I read it. You got a fair amount of shit gone wrong

 

Contusions on the medial tibial plateau= you got a "bone bruise" in the knee, on the top of the shin bone that is flat, where the condyles for the femur (thigh bone) pivot on the knee. The cushion here is the meniscus. It is horseshoe shaped.
The space the knee uses for cushioning and such is significantly closed down from normal. Could be from the acute fall/step, could be a long-standing problem that is just being noted. They go through all the findings on the radiological report, be it long standing or acute.
The meniscus, the cushion of the knee, moved forward. This is most likely from your injury. As it slid foward, it tore loose from its posterior anchoring. Ergo, the posterior horn of the medial (towards the inside of your knee) meniscus.
Then, just the ligaments in the area were strained. No tears. Natural history resolution for these can be 6-8 weeks.
Joint effusion, the fluid from the injury. Think the stuff inside a blister. The popliteal cyst is the same thing, only just below the skin versus in the bony joint space.

 

Make it two, in case one tears.