Employment Opportunity for Baghdad Bob!

Ari Fleischer announced his intention to leave his post as Press Secretary for the Bush White House (keep it clean here, guys...). And who would the perfect replacement be? None other than Mohammed Saeed al-Sahaf, the former Iraqi Information Minister, better known to the world at large as Baghdad Bob!

I mean, who else could offer a better explination of Dubya's economic policy better that BB himself: "It has been rumored that there are problems with our economic policy. I am now here to tell you that we do not have an economic policy and I do not know why there would be any problem with it."

OK, so I doctored that one a bit. But how about the real words of Baghdad Bob?

How about complaints from minorities? "I have detailed information about the situation . . . which completely proves that what they allege are illusions . . . They lie every day."

On statements by the North Koreans that they do not have nuclear weapons: "They are lying every day. They are lying always, and mainly they are lying to their public opinion."

On winning the minds and hearts of the Iraqi people: "We are winning!"

The "coalition of the willing"?: "Bush, Blair and Rumsfeld. They are the funny trio"

On pressure on the Congress to pass the tax cut: "We are surrounding them and pounding them. The whole trend has changed and we are going to finalize this very soon.''

To the first reporter who attempts to snare him with a tangled question: "I will only answer reasonable questions"

On Department of Defense budget cuts: "Rumsfeld, he needs to be hit on the head"

On French President Jacques Chirac: "the leader of the international criminal gang of bastards."

On the strength of the French military: "They are retreating on all fronts. Their military effort is a subject of laughter throughout the world."

On the UN: "The United Nations.... a place for prostitution under the feet of Americans."

On the rasing of terroristic threat level to Level Orange: "No I am not scared, and neither should you be!"

http://resthome.50megs.com/true.jpg

Check http://www.welovetheiraqiinformationminister.com/index.html for more quotes from Baghdad Bob and how they can apply to his new job as White House spokesman.

Gee, I hope he gets the job!

 

:up:

Very good!!

Rodger

 

You left out "with a shoe!"

Actually the guy who would be an excellant replacement would be Tony Blair, but that's not realistic.

 

Actually the guy who would be an excellant replacement would be Tony Blair, but that's not realistic.

Isn't he just Bush's poodle anyway?

 

Damn! I think we finally got ourselves another token liberal to keep Doyle from getting lonely!

 

More Quotes From MMS as Spokesman-at-Large-for-Anyone

Who are in control, they are not in control of anything - they don't even control themselves!" - MSS, FOXNews commentator on a talking-heads discussion of who controls the Democrats.

"I can assure you that those villains will recognize, will discover in appropriate time in the future how stupid they are and how they are pretending things which have never taken place." - MSS, Flat Earth Society spokesman after TV coverage of Niel Armstrong and Buzz Aldrin walking on the moon, July, 1969.

"The American press is all about lies! All they tell is lies, lies and more lies!" - MSS, Al Gore spokesman after the polls closed in Florda, November, 2000.

"I have detailed information about the situation...which completely proves that what they allege are illusions . . . They lie every day." - MSS, personal spokeman for Bill Clinton on the allegations of several female companions.

"The British forces which were dropped there have been eliminated mostly on the (battle)field, except for those who fled ... It is a complete defeat ... Amazingly the Americans have pushed the British to do that. They pushed them ahead as if it is an experiment. The result was very tragic for the British." - MMS, reporting the situation in Normandy, 1944, to Adolf Hitler.

"These cowards have no morals. They have no shame about lying" - MSS, Mafia spokesman on the latest round of Federal indictments handed down.

"Our estimates are that none of them will come out alive unless they surrender to us quickly." - MSS, French military spokeman, SE Asia, 1954

"the louts of colonialism." - MMS statement rejected by former VP Spiro T. Agnew in faver of the now-(in)famous nathering nabobs of negativism.

"Their forces committed suicide by the hundreds.... The battle is very fierce and God made us victorious. The fighting continues." - MSS, reporting to Darth Vader on the battle for the Death Star.

"Our armed forces, according to their tactics, are leaving the way open" - MSS making a report to Napoleon on the Battle of Waterloo.

The possibilities are endless.....

 

You'd think the coalition forces would be able to flush him out by letting him know how filthy stinkin' rich he's going to be by surrendering to an agent and touring the US! The Brother Theodore of the 21st century!

 

Update from the MSS website! Updates on the hunt for MSS! Absolutely the truth!

As posted on http://www.welovetheiraqiinformationminister.com/index.html

30 April -- BBC confirms reports that M.S.S. is alive in Baghdad, fears for his safety, and "seeks surrender" to US forces. G.I.s refuse to make arrest, reportedly because M.S.S. does not appear among the 55 faces on the "Most Wanted" deck of playing cards.... (click here http://www.greatusaflags.com/ ) We offer soldiers free "I Helped Rescue the Iraqi Information Minister and All I Got Was This Lousy T-Shirt." (click to buy your own http://www.cafeshops.com/welovemss.5899882 )

May Allah be praised as he roasts the stomachs of the infidels in hell when they do not believe the truth as I have told you!

 

Liberal is not a dirty word, but i have never considered myself to be one -- I am usually to far to the right (militaristic and pro-second amendment) or to the left (nationalize the banks) to be a liberal!

Rodger

 

Damn! I think we finally got ourselves another token liberal to keep Doyle from getting lonely!

Just informing you of what a lot of the British people think