Divorce help - God Damn Epidemic

Great ones!!

 

We agree on both aspects. You snipped your quote too short, leaving off the complete thought. The point is, it is OK to expect X, so long as you declare it, and judge yourself by that yardstick as well.

It is likely she wants to be treated like a princess, which is a queen without accountability. Her parents did a fine job of infantilizing her, and in her mid thirties, the period of reconciliation with her upbringing became overdue somewhere in there.

Or she could just be a cute, vapid woman who doesn’t understand the words coming out of her mouth and looking for her 15 minutes.

Or somewhere in between…

 

Growing up in DC and especially having friends from all walks of life, and a lot of them 2nd generation Americans, you could see that play out (more so in our 20's) in numerous ways. People with strict, traditional homes would usually A) go to college away from home, cut loose, turn more typical Western, date different types of people (whether religion wise or ethnicity or even sub-group within their own background), etc... and had the confrontation with their parents at some point that was eventually reconciled in some fashion, or B) stayed the traditional course, either naturally met somebody more inline with the traditional ideals of their parents, dated and married, or a few even getting the, not arranged marriage per se, but let's say... coaxing or arranged opportunities (cultural functions, events, conventions, etc...) that lead to finding somebody who aligns with those values.

Being stuck in the middle of two worlds is DEFINITELY rough, and it seems super hard for these people when they can't just pick one, as evident here.

Also, in the case of MY 40 Year Old Virgin example... I way later found out that her mom was abusive, would call her a fat ugly piece of shit (she's small and super cute and totally in shape) and stuff like that and tell her she wouldn't amount to anything all the time, which then just made me feel sad for her... so less cultural conflict and more so emotional damage, but all the same, it made her weird about dating and fucked up her perception of what she was trying to find in a mate for a long long time.

 

The current culture in our society is severely short of cooperation and compromise, in most all interactions and transactions.

 

Sorry about that, didn't mean to cut your full thoughts short.

I think the difference is how we see that piece in bold. I think most men don't think that piece is ok/realistic/worth putting their time into, regardless off if she (in this case) plans to measure themselves by the same yard stick.

To hear someone say "I want to be treated like a queen" is an immediate turnoff and is a point that a lot of serious men, looking for serious relationships will lose interest in that individual. To paraphrase Dave Chappelle, hearing that makes my balls hurt,

 

Where is this place that "serious men" go looking for relationships?? I have never heard of such a thing.
I know there were various "same religion socials" as well as "inter religion" mixers in the town I grew up in... that was always hilarious.
I mean there it is... the pool of approved candidates to date... none the least bit appealing. How socially uncomfortable were those events...lol
Then you have the gals that have a great relationship but the religion is wrong. Sorry Charlie... later.

 

Its called the serious store, of course. Just a reference to a "group of men" who are at a point that they are looking for something serious, i.e. a wife, a future mother of their children, someone to build a life and family with. That's a lot different that the guys at the party looking "a good time". They are looking for completely different calibers of women for completely different purposes.

 

We have owned about 40+ vehicles, if they were new I never test drove most of them. I knew it would be gone in a year or two anyway...the amount of time it takes to get bored of them.

 

That’s a lot of divorces…

 

I just traded in my AMG for a Corolla Hatchback haha. I literally drove it to the next light and drove back and was like, okie dokie. The dude was all salesman excited when I came back like, "SO! HOW'D YOU LIKE IT!?" and I was just like, "well... it certainly is a Corolla? If you've drive 1 you've driven them all..."

 

Looks like all of them should wait until at least 30, LOL!

"Now a very important thing I told my daughters and granddaughters — no serious guys until you’re 30!" Biden said to an unknown young woman at an event in Irvine, California.

"Ok," the woman said as the president leaned in close. "I’ll keep that in mind."

 

You mean legitimately take care of them, or just a split of responsibilities along more traditional gender roles?

When I was looking for a wife I made my expectations clear that I wanted a woman who cooks, wanted children, and would keep a clean house (I cook and clean too, but I wanted someone who wasn't repulsed by the thought of her doing those things). I do all of the yard work, home repairs, vehicle repairs, etc...

Some people might try and frame this as her taking care of me.

 

So, was the AMG coming up on some serious repairs, or did you get the first 2023 GR Corolla in the country?

 

The guys that expect to have their every whim catered to and give little to the relationship are just as bad as the women who expect to have everything paid for while adding very little to the relationship. People who think like these 2 groups make alot of money for the divorce lawyers though.

 

If many of those wanting to be treated like a "queen" paid much attention to history, they might not be so eager to be deemed as such.

 

neither. SE hatchback. I DID just do brakes on the AMG, but that's a standard easy affair besides Brembo shit costs a little more. it had its 10k coming up in like 800 miles, which ends up being about once a year. It really honestly had like zero problems. When I got it I still had a tiny bit of warranty left. I had them fix a rattling vent surround, rattling seat belt adjuster, and a timing chain cover breather. Those were the only things outside of maintenance the entire time I owned it. Was a really great car actually. I GUESS, if I woulda kept it another 3-4 years, we'd start to be getting into like, maybe a turbo getting tired or bushings/mounts, etc getting old and dry, but nothing up to like 80k miles and 7 years.

I WOULD get a GR, I love the way it looks and the numbers and shit, but its literally a $45k (before mark-ups which you KNOW are gonna be out of control considering dealerships are getting like 1 each) Corolla. I just can't bring myself to do that. Its literally my AMG with shittier interior and slight better suspension geometry design. I woulda just kept it at that point.

The main driver was: I want to make my life cheaper and streamline shit I spend money on. I barely drive these days except to go ride my mtb somewhere and get food. I didn't put anything extra down, owed a few G's, and my payments went from $450/mo. to $180/mo still. I thought about just paying for it, but I was like nyeahhhh I'll let it ride. Paid less for a new one than Carmax and most all places are selling used ones for with 25k+ miles on them. MPG is going from ABOUT 21mpg to about 35mpg, and regular gas too. Cheaper brakes, cheaper tires, cheaper oil changes. Its a Toyota Corolla it'll last forever.

I decided I don't really care about leather or heated seats or having a Merc emblem, and the only thing missing I kinda wanted was fog lights. I bought springs, sway bars, 17x9's, and dope tires already haha. I'ma leave it at that just to handle a little better. I decided instead of an all-around fun car, I'll just keep this car and buy or build an ACTUAL full ass race car next time I get the itch... 911 or Ultima GTR with a 4-rotor in it or something. For now... thinking about walking out of my job if it rubs me the wrong way and taking the whole summer off (which I haven't quit a job without a next job lined up continuously since I was 14) and just riding my bike and painting some helmets and enjoying living. Or investing into some properties. Every little bit helps.