Okay time to liven things up a bit with some jokes!

Discussion in 'General' started by Pepe Le Ghey Pew, Oct 25, 2007.

  1. cha0s#242

    cha0s#242 Ignorance and prejudice and fear walk hand in hand

    The cost of living has increased so much lately, my wife started having sex with me again to save on batteries.
  2. lar3ry

    lar3ry Member

    Q: What do Winnie the Pooh and Attila the Hun have in common?

    A: Same middle name.
    sharkattack likes this.
  3. BHP41

    BHP41 Calling out B.A.N. everyday

    My PC has been having speed issues so I painted it black thinking it would run faster, now it just doesn’t work.
    auminer likes this.
  4. BHP41

    BHP41 Calling out B.A.N. everyday

    What’s the them song to the Special Olympics ?

    They see me rollin’
    auminer likes this.
  5. zertrider

    zertrider Waiting for snow. Or sun.

    That may cross a line
  6. BHP41

    BHP41 Calling out B.A.N. everyday

    What line ?
    Would it make those that claim to be offended feel any better that I heard that from a black person ?
    Didn’t know there needed to be an * next to a fucking joke. :rolleyes:

    So you take issue with that joke and not about the Special Olympics one?? Gotta be woke , eh….

    Anyway. It is funny as fuck. Both of them :crackup::crackup::crackup:
  7. Sabre699

    Sabre699 Wait...hold my beer.

    :crackup: Butt hurt is now a life style.
    R Acree and sharkattack like this.
  8. kenessex

    kenessex unregistered user

    I am not butt hurt about them, but I did find both jokes to be offensive. Stereotyping which is used to make any group or race seem lesser than the audience is not funny to me. I find it pathetic, but I am not willing to say that people can't enjoy humor where they find it.
  9. auminer

    auminer Renaissance Redneck

    ClemsonsR6 and BHP41 like this.
  10. kenessex

    kenessex unregistered user

    Like I said, I am not complaining, I just find it pathetic. I no longer have the the interest or energy to try and educate the ignorant, they can just be whoever they want to be. Because it is possible that they are right and I am wrong.
  11. BHP41

    BHP41 Calling out B.A.N. everyday

    Did your girlfriend steal your password…..again … damn.
    sharkattack likes this.
  12. Banditracer

    Banditracer Dogs - because people suck

    Most stereotypes get started because they're usually true. Just sayin...
    sharkattack likes this.
  13. kenessex

    kenessex unregistered user

    Nice:D A response which is both pathetic and yet predictable. Why not just own your sense of humor rather than deflect onto someone who has a different one?
  14. BHP41

    BHP41 Calling out B.A.N. everyday

    You obviously didn’t get the reference….:crackup::whoosh:
  15. auminer

    auminer Renaissance Redneck

    A blonde gets a job as a physical education teacher of 16-year-olds.

    She notices a boy at the end of the field standing alone, while all the other kids are running around having fun kicking a ball.

    She takes pity on him and decides to speak to him.

    'You ok?' she says.

    'Yes.' he says.

    'You can go and play with the other kids you know' she says.

    'No, it's probably best I stay here.' he says.

    'Why's that sweetie?' says the blonde.

    The boy looks at her incredulously and says,

    "Because I'm the Goalie!"
    lar3ry likes this.
  16. lar3ry

    lar3ry Member

    A woman gets a job at a hardware store. A few days later a customer asks for a file, and walks over to the case containing a wide selection of files.

    He points to one of them and says "I'll take that 12" flat bastard."

    Offended, she says "Just a second, please.", and goes into the boss's office.
    She asks him if she has to put up with a customer who swears. The boss says "No. Definitely not.", and they go out of the office.

    The boss says "Oh, Hi Jim, What seems to be the problem?"
    Jim replies, "No problem. I just want to buy that 12" flat bastard."

    Boss says "OK", and sells him the file."

    When Jim leaves, he educates the woman on all the different types of files.

    A few weeks later a customer asks if they carry files.

    She says "Of course, sir", and leads him to the case.

    "As you can see we have a good selection of files. "mill files, rat tails, smooth, half round, and so on. Would you like one of these flat bastards?"

    Customer says "No. Just gimme one of these round motherfuckers."
    FZRCraig likes this.
  17. lar3ry

    lar3ry Member

    Shortly after WWII, a BBC program featured an interview of a Polish pilot who flew Spitfires with an RAF squadron during the war.

    The interviewer asked if he was ever afraid.

    "Of course", the pilot replied. "Not beingk too afraid most of time, but one time vas very frightened.
    I vas patrolingk near Voges river, and out from sky above myself down came divingk four fokkers high on top from me."

    The interviewer hastily intervened, "I'd like to point out to our listeners that the Fokker was an aircraft flown by the Germans during the war.
    Isn't that right, sir?"

    "Oh. Ya. Is true. But, dese fokkers vas all flyingk Messerschmidts!"
    R Acree and rd400racer like this.
  18. lar3ry

    lar3ry Member

    Guy gets on a bus. He looks over the other passengers and sees a couple of black folks. He proclaims loudly, "My name is Brown. B-R-O-W-N. I'm white from the top of my head to the tip of my toes, and I hate coons."

    A few blocks later, a Chinese fellow gets on. The guy stands up and says "My name is Brown. B-R-O-W-N. I'm white from the top of my head to the tip of my toes, and I hate gooks."

    Just then another fellow stands up and says "My name is Finklestein F-I-N-K-L-E-S-T-E-I-N. I'm white from the top of my head to the tip of my toes, except for my asshole, which is brown. B-R-O-W-N.
  19. auminer

    auminer Renaissance Redneck

    ....... Swing and a miss.
    sharkattack likes this.
  20. lar3ry

    lar3ry Member

    The Brown one? Should I delete it?

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