How to vacate bats??

So I apparently have a bat or multiple living inside a column(s) on my back porch.

Definitely need to get rid of them before it becomes a BIG issue.

What's the best option that is known to work that will prevent them from reentering the columns so that I can cap off the top?

 

Bats are very sensitive to sound.

Best bang for the buck is to duct tape @Metalhead to the column and attach a TENS unit to his testicles. The shrieking should drive the bats from their roosts and provide days of entertainment.

 

Get a bat house. https://batworld.org/bat-house-information/

They're good to have around, don't kill them.

 

Hire a professional with experience in bat removal. Do NOT try to do it yourself,

 

I second keeping them around to control your nuisance insect populations

 

i like my bats.


we go clubbing.

 

Mothballs are supposed to drive them off. Don't know if this an old wives tale or not....

 

You have to create a one way door, like a check valve. Make sure they can fly out of it, but can't get back in. But put up a bat house in a tree first because you want them around.

 

Call Batman or @Gorilla George, he'll speak to them

 

Why do you need to get rid of them?
They are really great to have around as they eat a ton of bugs.

Maybe you can encourage them to migrate if you put up a bat house. I have one like this on the side of my house:

 

They also sell a small catcher that sits at the bottom incase the bat pups fall. They can then climb back up & in.

 

My BiL got his bats to move by hanging a piece of screen door material over their entrance/egress. They can fly out but the screen prevents them from flying in, and they can't pick up the material or climb underneath it. I believe that he lightly weighted the end of the material against the house to make sure that no gaps were present.

 

No. Mothballs poison the pups, which typically can’t fly until end of Summer.

 

So you're saying none of the pups will grow to adult size and live in his house?

 

Fuck bats. Had one get into my house somehow a few years ago. Their shit is toxic or at least very bad for you, from what I remember. Also, if you find one in your place and can't say for certain that it didn't bite you or shit in your mouth or any other nightmare scenario while you were sleeping, you have to get a full rabies panel of shots. Not sure if that last bit is true, but it's what I was told. Be careful how you get rid of them, around here (WI) they're a protected species. Fuck bats.

 

Bats are cool. When I used to have to visit the Chevron office in Malongo (Angola), there were bats everywhere, like thousands of them. It would be so many that you thought the sky was black. They didn’t hurt anything.

It was also wild monkeys everywhere, thousands of them. They were so used to people that they would just walk beside you, try to grab food off your plate, hang around outside the office, etc.

I was sitting at a picnic table one time, leaning my chest against the table, with both hands down on my thighs, and a damn monkey ran under the table, grabbed the protein bar out of my hand, and hauled ass.

The funny part is that he KNEW he stole something that wasn’t his, because when he came out from under the table he was in a dead sprint (they normally walk slowly), and held my protein bar over his head, waving it back and forth like “look, look, I got your shit!”

 

Scotty -- you are starting to sound like 'Toe fella near a spider. There are legions of species, and of the eight in your state, only one is protected.
Bats are truly great creatures and do a lot more ecological good than harm. Current exploding threat is white nose syndrome which has caused a lot of population decline across the Nation.
And while it is true that evolutionally bats are destined to rule to future, some humans cherish bat guano (if you are into growing things).