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Dear Target....you suck

Discussion in 'General' started by Metalhead, Oct 9, 2018.

  1. Metalhead

    Metalhead Dong pilot

    Went to my local Target today for some stuff. Ain't been in a couple of months. Last time I was there, they were doing a renovation. Kinda got on my nerves, so I avoided the place. Till today. And I am NOT fucking happy.

    So, I walk in and am immediately met with a very nice looking entryway, buggy corral (with new buggies), and cash register area. Pretty spiffy it was. I was impressed.

    Then I turned left to head into the snackbar area. They have the BEST fucking popcorn. Me and my kids always get some when we go. Been doing that since they were knee high to a grasshopper. The same ol lady has been working there for years. She always pops us up some fresh cause she knows us.

    Except, as I turned to roll in, I noticed something was wrong. The snack bar was gone. In it's place was a fancy ass coffee/pastry type place. Manned by a punk ass kid chick with an I-phone jammed in the back pocket of her skinny jeans. We had this conversation....

    Me: Where the hell's the snack bar?
    Her: They changed it to a coffee shop.
    Me: Well that blows. Where's the old woman that used to work it?
    Her: In sporting goods.
    Me: Eff. So, got any popcorn?
    Her: No sir, they got rid of it.
    Me: That REALLY effing blows.
    Her: Haha yep.


    The end.
     
  2. Cam Morehead

    Cam Morehead Husband, Dad, Racer

  3. Dave K

    Dave K DaveK über alles!

    Burn it down and piss in the ashes!!!!
     
  4. Steeltoe

    Steeltoe What's my move?

    Coffee chick hot or not? She got tatts?
     
    SuddenBraking and Joe Lopez like this.
  5. Metalhead

    Metalhead Dong pilot

    Yes tattoos. Some forearm shit. Like roses and vines and cool sayings and shit. But, she was 20 or some shit. I wasn't there for the young gals, I was going to check out MILFS. Plus, she had major muffin top going on. And heavy eyeliner. Not my thing.
     
    SGVRider and Gino230 like this.
  6. bored&stroked

    bored&stroked Disclaimer: Can't spell

    Maybe the old lady is hiding the machine in the sporting goods section.
     
    K51000 likes this.
  7. fastedyamaha

    fastedyamaha Well-Known Member

    A friend told me that that's were he bought you that magnificent Lorenzo GOAT statue that you received from Secret Santa :beer:
     
    Phl218 likes this.
  8. eggfooyoung

    eggfooyoung You no eat more!

    MILF's rule, Metalheads drool!
     
    blkduc likes this.
  9. Metalhead

    Metalhead Dong pilot

    I still have it. It's awesome.
     
  10. Metalhead

    Metalhead Dong pilot

    Shut up.
     
  11. R Acree

    R Acree Banned

    Dear Metalhead...you suck!

    Target.
     
  12. eggfooyoung

    eggfooyoung You no eat more!

  13. fastedyamaha

    fastedyamaha Well-Known Member

    Maybe you'll get another this year so you'll have a matching set :crackup:
     
  14. Tristan

    Tristan Well-Known Member

    New euphemism added to my vocabulary!
     
    auminer likes this.
  15. cha0s#242

    cha0s#242 Ignorance and prejudice and fear walk hand in hand

    Target made a made ass of themselves when they "invaded" Canada with a huge investment to open a ton of stores and then closed all of them two years later.
     
  16. Funkm05

    Funkm05 Dork

    Fixed
     
  17. Tristan

    Tristan Well-Known Member

    I don't know how they're still in business. Target= Walmart for people that think they're too classy to shop Walmart.
     
  18. 88/532

    88/532 Simply Antagonistical

    I haven’t been in a Target in a while. Do they still have those stupid red balls at the entrance. Never quite understood those.
     
  19. R Acree

    R Acree Banned

    Walmart thinks he sucks too.
     
  20. Mongo

    Mongo Administrator

    Fancy versions of a concrete post to stop people from driving through the doors.
     

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