Lately I’ve been voraciously reading books like: think and grow rich, how to win friends and influence people, laws of human nature, outliers, etc.. my questions to those of you who are arguably successful.... 1- have you read much of these types of books and if so... 2- how helpful are they really
I find the problem with chasing "success" is, there is no end. You get the job, the salary, the "whatever" and then what, chase "more success?" The goal post moves and moves and moves, you end up chasing success that has no end leaving you unfulfilled and feeling unsuccessful. Comparing your success to others is just as futile because while we are all equal as humans, there is not equal outcome from each of us so your success may be less or more than the next person. But then in that, what your idea of success may be may not be someone else's idea of success is. Most of these books are all about someone else's success not yours so who's to say its good advice? I prefer goals and setting them to achieve them or fail at them. "Success" can be found in failure of achieving goals just as much as achieving them so long as you learn on the way to trying to accomplish said goals. A key is to learn what you did well, what did not work on your way to achieving them or failing to achieve them and applying those lessons learned to the next one. I find continued personal growth far more rewarding than perceived success.
I’ve found that the books I’m reading do not emphasize the outlet for success as more than a personal decision. The focus is more on the behaviors and tactics and thought processes behind reaching whatever goal you set your mind to than the subjective nature of the goal. I do have to admit it’s somewhat changed the way I think in terms of long and short term achievement. How that might translate into “success” remains to be seen, but so far it seems to be pointing me in the right direction. Not saying I’m going to end up a multi millionaire or anything but I definitely get the sense that I’m focusing more on my life’s fulfillment on my own terms.
Forget reading the books. The first thing you have to do is define what "success" means for you. Not everyone has the same definition. Bought he way if you bought the book you just participated in someone else's definition of success.
I already have a clear image of what that looks like to me and even broken it down into 1, 2.5, 5, and 10 year goals
Then get to work and stop sitting around reading unless you need to educate yourself about something that will help move you in the direction of what you have defined as success.
Unless you are missing some form of education, training or *really* need to work on personal interaction, start hitting the tactical things needed to achieve what you have defined as "success" Otherwise, treat that reading for what it is; leisure/hobby reading on psychology.
You also need to learn to count to 3 before you actually react. You'd be surprised how many conflicts I can avoid by counting to three in my head before I reply to work related interactions.
Figure out first, how you determine 'success'. Figure out second what you are already good at. I can read between the lines of your posts that you have a couple of more marbles than most. Use that to determine how to leverage your existing strengths to achieve your definition of success and quit trying to achieve success the way the guys who could only write about success did. Edit : I left out the best part. While you are figuring out what you are good at, more importantly, figure out what you aren't good at. And stop doing that. Seems obvious, but it kicks a lot of people in the ass.