FB Marketplace horror stories

Here lately I've been doing "porch pickup" for smaller items. Has worked exceptionally well. Just put the item on the back porch and they leave money under a mat. Never even have to talk to these people that way!

 

I love the part about "reporting." THIS WILL GO DOWN ON YOUR PERMANENT RECORD!

Thanks for the story and the laugh. We've all been there!

 

How are things in Bedford Falls?

 

To counteract all the negative energy from this Karen, I will tell you a story with a much happier ending.

When I bought my new F-150 I ordered new wheels and tires with it. So I had to sell the nice 20" aluminum Ford wheels with brand new tires. Literally like 50 miles on them. I put them on FB marketplace.

Now, those of you who have done business in South Florida know that if you are lucky enough to deal with someone who approaches you online speaking English, It's probably been translated with Facebook's shitty translation app and therefore much interpretation is required. This can raise the aggravation level just past the point where it's not worth it. But this was a good size sale, I think $1500 or so IIRC. So I manage to make a deal with this guy and he comes over to get the stuff. Brings Cash. He's clearly a working man making a living with his truck and his tires are completely bald, so this is a good deal for him. This makes me happy.

A few hours later he texts me saying they don't fit, the new ones are 6 lug and the old ones are 5 lug or some shit. Now, usually, these types of dudes are pretty resourceful, and have a huge network of people in Miami, including a guy that could make Acura Integra wheels fit on that truck if needed. But this guy must be new. So He asks for my help. I look up an adapter on Summit Racing, it's cheap, and I send him the link. I tell him if he can't make it work, just bring them back, I will give him his money back. For a week or so I hear nothing.

Then a week later I get a long, poorly translated text, saying that he works very hard for his money, and ever since he came here to the USA he has been warned about all the ways you can get screwed. But he will never forget that I dealt with him honestly and didn't try to steal his hard earned money. So clearly he got the adapters and they worked, along with a few cervezas, everyone is happy.

The End.

 

Well clearly the solution to that problem was to cut the studs off and weld them back on in the proper quantity and locations.

 

Ahh. I see you've done business in Miami before, and are possibly even a member of the network I was referring to!

 

I lived in Broward county long enough.

 

I am in process of selling off a bunch of stuff my mother collected over the years. She passed away late last year and I have a bunch of stuff to get rid of.

screw FB and Craigslist. I have been using a local auction service Velvet Cricket I just drop stuff off, they market and auction it and simply take a cut. Once I drop something off I never really think about it again until a check shows up in my mailbox.

 

That’s sneaky. I gotta admire the little fucker.

Personally I never tell people if this, but that. I research the price on eBay and Craigslist and list it for the lower end of the range. If they try to text message negotiate I make like Mongo and just keep responding with “No”. If something isn’t worth researching the price, I give it away or just put it on the side of the road in front of my building and a Mexican will come by and make use of it.

I don’t use FB marketplace, I stick to Craigslist. I write extremely curt ads and use a Google Voice number. Anyone stupid I block on their very first message. If someone is a retard with their first message, they’ll continue to be a problem even if you sell it to the jerkoff. Missed meeting times without adequate prior notice also get you blocked. Show zero tolerance for stupidity or flakiness on Craigslist and other selling channels and your selling experience will be 1000x better. I never have problems moving stuff, there are too many decent buyers out there to waste even a second on the morons.

 

I call them walmartians. They've been catered to by big box store customer service their entire lives and don't know anything different. Scum of the earth.

 

Facebook is a scourge on this world, yet they managed to destroy Craigslist (or really Craigslist destroyed themselves) so I don't really have options. I've had a blank profile for 5-6 years, and people always ask why I don't have any Facebook friends. What's more likely, I'm a psychopath killer that has been taking victims for 5 years completely untraced.... or I don't keep a public social profile?

Anyways, I'm not there to buy mega-rare items, there's always other shit out there to buy. Those 20-30% of people who get scared off don't get my sale.

 

Both. I vote for Both..

 

Everytime someone tells me "the customer is always right" I reply with "the customer who thinks they are always right is always an asshole". I've never been wrong.

 

Oh, no, I said a return for a refund. One would think you'd know me better by now.

 

I listed My '04 Multistrada on FB for a fairly low price ($2650.00) and was ready to deal down to 2 grand. It needed a replacement dash (already purchased and went with the bike) and ECU reflash to make it work, the cost which I stated in the ad . It ran ok, and I was aware that there could be possible issues with premature valve guide wear but I didn't know it for a fact, thus the price. I got plenty of messages about the bike, but the first was a guy trying to lecture me about how no one ever pays bluebook private sale prices. When I told him no to his ridiculous offer of $800.00, he went off on the whole "good luck selling to some sucker" thing like I'm never going to sell it for what I was asking. Then I get guys who are doing their homework and asking lots of questions and I told them straight up that there could be possible valve guide issues and the options and cost to fix, because they asked what issues there were. Then I got a guy who wants to come over immediately to check it out. I said in the ad that I would not allow test rides without seeing a motorcycle endorsement on their license and not without cash in my hand. He says he doesn't have a license so I said no test ride. He then replies that he can have a "friend with some riding experience check it out" so I said OK. We make the appointment so he shows up with the rider dude and a "mechanic". The bike didn't start right away but it finally got going and then they point out the check engine light and I say: " I didn't notice that when I was working on it. I really didn't so I just said yes, it has a check engine light and I don't know why. The riding dude goes out on the bike and rides up and down the street coming back near my house and he's stomping the shifter like he's at a hoedown while I'm cringing. He pulls in and says: It's not downshifting right. So I say "I've never had a single issue with shifting" I go get my helmet and take off on the Duc and it's shifting perfectly. I come back and say so and I tell him that rev matching big twin to the gear is different than with an inline four that the riding buddy rode in on. They point out a few issues and I acknowledged them. The guy offers me 2 grand and I say no because I legitimately have two other potential buyers waiting to come and see it. We haggle to $2450 and do the deal. I get a message the next day about the transmission being "Locked up" and that the clutch switch was bad, it's not starting, and "I want my money back". I tell him it the transmission was working perfectly when I owned it and that I would replace the clutch switch since the repair I made on that failed. He mellowed out and thanked me for being willing to replace the switch. In the course of the whole deal, I told him multiple times to take it to Jeff Zoerb at Moto Z because he is hands down the best Ducati mechanic in the Buffalo area. The guy says "No, I don't trust other people to work on my stuff"

He never took it to an real mechanic that I know of and I saw the bike back on FB marketplace a week later for $2800.00 saying that it needed clutch plates. I felt bad for the dude but I also felt that I didn't need to be educating him on all the things that could possibly be wrong with the before he bought it. If he had asked about what those possible issues were I would have told him as I did with the other potential buyers who did their homework.

 

I would have eventually told her the truth was I was hoping the seat fell off, impaled her to death and I was somewhat upset she was still alive to call me about it then hung up. F dumb people wasting my time

 

No doubt. That's why I would demand that she return it.

And let's not forget that she is coming for you if her kid gets hurt in an accident.