I fucked up, how do I fix this with my mom?

So in light of new developments, Im off two for a while, not just recovery, but my ER nurse was not to happy, (apparently she knows all the nurses and doctors in my room when my gear was cut off) Well my parents have not been big fans of my decisions since the divorce, they think the wife and I moved too fast, and while we butt heads we are really happy. My mother shit on the relationship again, because of how we have been treated, I thought my Irish mom and German dad didnt like that I married a Nigerian. I said so. It broke her, she wouldnt answer the phone, my sisters, texted me, even my dad when my wife tried to explain.

 

Okay, try this again right before the next scheduled round of painkillers so what you have in you right now can wear off as much as possible.

 

Did you hit your head again? A roll of pennies makes more cents/sense than this post.

Did you move to fast? Yeah....Duh....NO shit.

And that has absolutely NOTHING to do with anyone's ethnic backgrounds or race.

You posted a photo...she looks like a smashing woman...so a great choice....but, there would have been NOTHING wrong with
letting the relationship grow and evolve a little before you tied the knot again, if you ever chose to do that.

That being said....you're not sleeping with your Mom (well, I hope not...that's just ewwwww).

You married this woman...remember the "Forsake all others part" of your vows? That means your wife comes first in your life now, not Mom.

My first wife forgot that part of the vows we said, and even if she remembered, didn't understand the full meaning of what the implications of those words meant. Her "Mom and Dad come first" mentality put a giant wedge between us. Actually, the second wife was the same way...what's up with that? I know...I know....my poor choices...I own it.

 

I would like to offer some helpful advice, but I find myself a wee bit perplexed.

 

Did you try charging the gate at area51 and they zapped you with one of those alien technology brain f@ckin' rayguns?

Think of the positive, no anal probing this time.

 

If they brain zap you, you forget about the anal probe. Until you eat a pepperoni and jalapeno pizza, of course.

 

How to fix your ageing Mom's world view of things? Can't be done in my experience, they are who they are and only behave that way as they have your best interests at heart. With time you'll see eye to eye again, maybe just not over the near term.

 

Come again???

 

Has he been out drinking with Roy ? WTF ?

 

What's not to understand about perpetual drama? Some people have it, some people don't.

 

Wtf???

 

All I got out of that giberish was

 

Er.... maybe divorce your mom?..

You know the feeling when you have something horrible in front of you but your still fascinated because you don't know what it is....

<Counting:One leg, two legs, three legs...>

 

When you sober up the title should read "I fucked up by letting my mother think she has any input into my adult life." Your mother doesn't have to approve of your choices. It's not her life you are continously screwing up.

 

I’ve seen movies where after mediation they got along well.
But NSFW

 

My first thought is that once you married this woman, you agree to put her first, even before yourself. And she agreed to do the same for you, even before herself. So that means if mom doesn't like it, then tough shit. As long as your wife isnt mistreating you, then mom needs to back off.

I love my mother to end of the earth and back. But there is no way I can put her before my wife, or allow her to mistreat my wife. And by disrespecting your relationship, that's what she's doing. My quick $0.02

 

Yes, you moved too fast. You were divorced what a couple months before getting married again? And you butt heads with the new wife already?
I guess when you get divorced again you will see that you moved too fast.
That said, these guys are right. Your wife is first, not your mom. You need to let your mother know that she can be part of your life again when she is ready to accept your wife.

 

Why don't you go on Ebay and see if you can find yourself some new "gear"?

 

No pain killers, I dont like pills. Sorry if my post was all about drama, just let my brain dump.
For those in question about the first sentence, I had a bad street accident where the helmet came off. Wife is an ER nurse at the hospital I was transferred to.
Thank you all for your advice, Im taking it to heart.
Sorry for the drama dump on the beeb.

 

Wait, you're already remarried?