Torturing my daughter's boyfriend

Basically this. Karma is a bitch.

 

Keep it up..? Good one.. he likely won't have an erection again until he is 30... heh.. But if that did not scare him away, ya better be prepared to have a "son" in the family...

Ron

 

did you use these?


But yea, you are kinda dead on that end with the daughter telling him.

I agree with Brixt as well, harrassing the boyfriend is a right of passage, it does not affect the daughter giving it out one way or another. She either will or won't with each guy she meets. You have your fun.

 

Back on topic:

If you ever get the chance to drive him somewhere, take a long, circuitous route. Make sure there is a roll of duct tape, a shovel, and a bag of lime in conspicuous view.

Ask to see pictures of his mom. Say she's hot. Then ask if she's DTF.

Call him by a different name every single time you see him.

Ask him if he wants to see your snuff porn collection.

Make him be your coffee table.

 

Fuggin with daughter's BFs used to be a favorite pastime of mine....

 

High five.


I've been on the receiving end of several of these.:up:

 

Now this is something I can see being funny for a long time if he sticks around for a while, but you have to keep a straight face and don't let the daughter or wife in on it. They'll just tell him

But be prepared to get it in return. That's what I'd do. Although if he does do this you may have found the perfect dude for your daughter

 

Dude, she's only 20

 

If your daughter is in on it , tell him your wife found your daughters "positive" pregnancy test in the bathroom while cleaning and he better come over because he has some explaining to do.

 

When my daughter was dating (she's 33 now) I had a 180 lb Chesapeake Retreaver. He was mean looking and mean acting to anyone I didn't socialize him to. Basically, the dog had to see me give the stranger a dog biscuit for the stranger to then give to the dog while I watched. So done he became a wimp and would just knock himself out trying to play with the new member of the family.....I never socialized any of her boyfriends...

 

And I was twenty once.

 

I woulda looked you in the eye and said, "It ain't mine; we don't use them things." Then when your eyes got as big as dinner plates, I would have let you in on the joke.

Going into it, I would have known if there was one in my wallet or not.

Good on ya for giving him one to use though.

 

When my daughter, now 39, was about 16, she was dating this dweeb that just drove me nuts.
One evening on my way home from work I just happened to stop at the gun shop and picked up a few boxes of .45 acp for a bit of shooting over the weekend.
I pulled in the drive and dweeb's car was there. I walked in just as he was giving her a smoochie. I calmly tossed him a box and said in the best flat dead voice I could muster: "Pick one out and write your name on it."
We didn't see much of him after that.
My daughter thought it was hilarious.
BTW, the word got around the local school pretty fast as well. Cut down on a lot of trouble.

 

My daughters last boyfriend was a girlie pants boy. I called him Justin Girlie pants.

 

Thats funny. Except...he's not packing rubbers.
He's either playing roulette with her cervix, drilling her in the can or treating her tonsils like his personal shooting gallery.
You should pull the little bastard aside and ask why he's not packing rubbers and not in a joking manner.

 

Or isn't dumb enough to keep them in his wallet. This argument is only valid if you've already been through his car, dresser, bathroom cabinets, etc, etc, etc.

 

When he throws it in your daughter (and he will) he is going to go for more based on you fucking with him. We've all been there, this kid is no different.

 

Hell my nieces fiancée was scared to death of me. My brother told him when they started getting serious that its not her father he had to worry about, its her psychotic uncle with all the heavy firepower and access to a backhoe that he has to worry about. For a while I could just glare at him and you could see him get nervous as hell. Then he figured it out that my brother was messing with him.

 

And he hasn't been seen since, huh?

 

Next time he's in your house and your daughter is upstairs getting ready, walk out wearing an open bathrobe, full dangle or maybe sporting a slight chubby, while cleaning your gun. Then say "So, Joey, do you like movies about gladiators?"